Wednesday, 30 March 2011

Proverbs Reduced To Truth

They say, most cliches contain a grain of truth. THIS IS THE NEWS: a grain is not very much. I mean, look at sand. Tiny. Wouldn't it be good if there were some sayings that contained a more reasonable amount of truth?

Yes it would. In fact, yes it is.

Because I have boiled down some proverbs, evaporating the  excess non-truth, to leave them pure. 100% Polyunsaturated Truth. Each serving contains 100% of an adult's RDA. IT'S GOOD FOR YOU.

Here we go:

1. A watched pot often boils.

2. Three lefts make a right.

3. Beware of Greeks bearing gifts (that contain hostile military forces).

4. You have to accumulate to accumulate.

5. A leopard cannot change a lightbulb. It lacks the manual dexterity.

6. Charity begins with a C.

7. People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw orgies.

8. The grass is always greener where there is an abundant supply of water, sunshine and nutrients.

9. Very few men are any form of landmass.

10. Better late than excessively late.

3 comments:

  1. Charity begins with a C! Love it! And, oh yes, I will be stealing this to use in as many conversations as I can!

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  2. I absolutely love this list.

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  3. @Jen: Steal away!

    @Sarah: Thanks! You're too kind.

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